Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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