when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
