I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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