I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
