Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
