oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
