sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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