What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
My penis needs a shock collar
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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