Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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