yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
