Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
