smell my finger.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
