I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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