i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
