I saw his package. It spoke to me.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Randomize
