have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
Randomize
