Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
