He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Randomize
