dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
