I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
