Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
