im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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