Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Randomize
