dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
