Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Randomize
