I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I'm bleeding and have questions
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
