**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
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