Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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