i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize