Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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