i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
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