The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
My penis needs a shock collar
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
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