oh god the rape fog is back!
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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