Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
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