I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
