We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
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