it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
