so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
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