I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Randomize
