Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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