You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
do herpes really smell.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
