Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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