Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
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