Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
I seem to have left my pride at pride
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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