went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I am mentally ready for anal.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
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