did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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