And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
