I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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