Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Randomize
