Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
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