come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
