Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
